From Setbacks to Significance: How Aghogho Built Community, Confidence, and a Calling

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Career like medicine.
People shrink because of mental

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health battles.
It's really well known how high

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like suicide rates are within
this profession because people

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don't rely on other people for
help and they really go through

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a lot of things alone and by
themselves.

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Today I am joined by someone
whose voice and actions are

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reshaping the features of many
young people across the world.

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A Go go is ABBC feature to
change makeup one of the Irish

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Times Face of the future.
I know so.

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A nominee for Tik Tok's Voices
for Change, Gogo is a current

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medical student at University
College Dublin.

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I went into that 6th exam with
the mindset of I don't care

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actually.
If I fail this time I'm going to

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keep trying.
If it takes me 10 more attempts

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to get into medicine, I will sit
this exam 10 more times.

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She was accepted on her sixth
try into magical school and her

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story of determination and
resilience inspires many young

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people today.
I'm a huge believer in

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educational equity.
I think it's unfortunate that

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certain groups in society really
don't have access to things that

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other groups are almost born
with.

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And also the founder of Achieve
with a Go Go, whose community of

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over 400,000 people follows her
for one united reason.

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A Go Go inspires each of them to
believe in themselves.

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Honestly, Annie, I I had to
learn how to rely on people for

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support.
I think that was one of the

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greatest lessons my dad's death
taught me.

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Being somebody who was very
hyper independent and has been

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that way for most of my life.
You sometimes fool yourself into

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thinking you can do everything
and you can't.

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I'll share something personal
that I haven't actually shared

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online before ever.
Basically, the week before my

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dad passed away, I had a.
Quick note before we start, if

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you have enjoyed this podcast
and want to support our

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incredible guests, please follow
LO to Grow podcast on Instagram

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and TikTok.
Welcome to Load to grow, the

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podcast transforming life's
toughest moments into

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opportunity for growth.
I'm Annie, a Focus on Authority

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Technology founder whose
entrepreneurship journey ran

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parallel to a mental health
awakening.

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In every episode, I sit down
with inspiring individuals and

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delve into how they managed to
turn their personal or

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professional challenges into
opportunities for growth.

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If you're facing uncertainty in
your life, feeling down, or

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simply need a kick of
inspiration to keep moving

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forward, this is your space for
the honest and uplifting

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conversations that you will want
to hear.

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Hit follow so you never miss an
episode and let's dive in our go

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go.
Welcome to my low to grow

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podcast.
It's a pleasure to have you.

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Let me start by asking you who
do you want to be listening to

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our conversation today?
Well, thank you so much for

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having me.
I think that the people who

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would benefit the most from
listening would be people who

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have experienced failure or
rejection in the past and they

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feel like they want to create
new things for themselves.

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They want to be able to believe
in themselves again.

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I think people who are looking
to grow their sense of

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confidence within themselves, as
well as people who have been

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through situations in the past
that they feel like might hold

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them back from success in the
future.

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So for example, the background
they've come from or certain

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life experiences.
I think that if people are

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looking for hope, this is the
right episode to listen to.

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Wonderful and I cannot wait to
delve into your story.

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I know.
So the learnings that you have

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had a monster with you a go go.
Where would you say that your

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story starts?
If I'm to go right back to it, I

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have a bit of AI, suppose
multifaceted career right now.

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I'm currently in my last year of
medical school, but I'm also the

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founder of a nonprofit and I'm a
speaker as well.

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So I do a couple different
things alongside being a content

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creator.
But going right back to the

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beginning of my story and my
career path is me deciding to

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become a doctor when I was
around 14 years old.

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It's a kind of a bit of a funny
story.

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I was walking down the hallway
in school with my friend at the

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time, and she mentions that she
wants to become a pediatric

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oncologist one day.
And I'm looking at her and I'm

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like, what is that?
And I had never heard of those

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words before at 14.
And she explains it's a doctor

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that takes care of kids who have
cancer.

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So I was really, really
intrigued by it.

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And that day I went home, went
into my like my laptop, searched

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on Google, pediatric oncologist,
and I went on this pretty much

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rabbit hole of the different
types of doctors that there are,

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what they do, how medicine
pretty much changes the world.

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And I became really, really,
really intrigued by it.

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And that's when I decided that I
wanted to become a doctor.

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I was somebody who until now was
really interested in like

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nutrition and diet and the
effects that the current like

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like western diet would have on
people's hearts in the future.

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And so that really drove me to
study medicine.

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But my journey to medicine is
very, very non linear, very

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unconventional.
It took me 6 attempts in total

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before I got admitted to medical
school.

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So the first time I sat like a
medical admissions exam.

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I was about 16 years old at the
time, and then the last time I

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sat one, I was 20.
I was 21 years old the last time

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I sat a medical exam or 22.
So it was a long journey.

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And I think for most people who
want to become doctors, it's a

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lot more straightforward.
Most people will write an exam

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once or a maximum of twice, and
then they'll get in.

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But I think the thing that makes
my story a little bit different

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is the fact that I didn't give
up.

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Each and every time I
experienced those failures, I

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would have these high hopes
that, you know, this is going to

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be the time.
And then I would be knocked down

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again.
And it just kind of kept

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happening like that over and
over and over again.

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I learned a lot through the
process, though.

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Yeah, it's interesting looking
back at it now because my

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journey into medicine is what
pretty much set me up to create

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an online platform of over
400,000 followers now.

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It's what set me up to build my
nonprofit, which focuses on

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helping students believe in
themselves, and it's achieved

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with Algo.
That's what the name of the

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nonprofit is.
And it's also helped me to

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become a public speaker because
now I have a story to share.

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I think it just kind of goes
back to that statement that

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people tend to say of turning
your pain into purpose.

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I feel like my life and my story
is a huge like example of that.

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That's such a beauty, for
example, of resilience and are

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so great.
And I really want to delve into

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what it felt like for you to
have tried 6 times over the

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course of five years to get into
medical school and only

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succeeding after six times.
Because a lot of people with

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your background and also with
the experiences that you were

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having at the time could have
easily given up or chosen to go

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down a different path.
That's also very successful, but

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not medicine.
So what kept you fixated on

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getting into medical school?
Yeah, so this is an interesting

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question.
I get asked this every time I do

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a talk, actually.
People seem to be really

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fascinated by the fact that I
didn't give up and I kept

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trying.
I think #1 is I've always been a

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very determined person.
When I want something for

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myself, I, I make sure I get it.
I almost would say that I'm

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stubborn to the extreme in that
where most people would say, OK,

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this is probably a sign I should
stop.

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I just see it as a challenge for
me to essentially keep going.

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And I think when it came to
medicine in particular, I knew

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that I had an interest in how
health would evolve over time,

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but I was also very interested
in science and in problem

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solving.
And what made me keep pursuing

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it is the fact I actually at
that time, and it's funny

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because we might speak about
this later, but I could only see

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medicine as the path for me.
I could not imagine myself in

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any other field or in any other
career or with any other job

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that would satisfy the sorts of
desires that I had, Especially

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when it came to things like my
interest in learning, my

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interest in continuous learning
and science and helping people.

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I feel like I did a lot of
exploration of different types

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of careers and I found that
medicine was the one that seemed

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to kind of hit that spot for me.
And so I went full force for it.

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But I think a big part of me
also continuing is I had really

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good support.
My dad was a huge, huge voice in

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my life.
And I, I think for a lot of

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people, the reason why they give
up on their dreams is because

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the people who are around them,
whether it's friends or family

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or community, they tell them
that maybe you should try

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something else.
Maybe you should consider a

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different career.
Maybe you should steer this way

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or that way.
But I had a father who was

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extremely like, he really,
really believed in me.

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And every time I experienced a
failure, he would react like it

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was the most normal thing and he
would just say, do you know

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what?
You can try again.

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It's completely OK if it doesn't
work out this time because

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you'll have another attempt in
the future where you'll be able

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to apply yourself and perhaps
you'll get in at that time.

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And so I think having that voice
that constantly said to me, you

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are capable, you have what it
takes, you can do this.

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It really instilled a sense of
self belief within myself that

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made me think, OK, even though
things aren't going in the way

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that I want, it doesn't mean
it's going to be this way

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forever.
And so I kept pushing for that

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for those reasons because I had
those voices and I had that

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determination.
And also my faith actually

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played a huge aspect in it as
well.

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I'm a big believer in purpose
and in how each human being I

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believe has a purpose here on
earth.

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And it took me a long time
before I, you know, believed

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that medicine was part of my
purpose here on earth.

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And I spent a lot of time
praying about it.

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And so once I had that sense of
peace that this is what I want

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and this is what I believe God
wants for me, I was like, no

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matter what, I'm going to go
full-fledged for this.

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And I know it's going to work
out because I saw it as

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something bigger than me.
And thankfully, I mean, on the

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sixth attempt, I ended up
getting it.

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So got got feeling if you call
it that, I don't know, it ended

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up being OK, yeah.
Wow, I love that and I also love

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how poignant today is that we're
recording this the eve after one

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of your big medical exams.
So thank you for taking the

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time.
I think a lot of other students

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that I know probably would have
chosen to take this evening off

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to go celebrate, but I really
appreciate you taking the time

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to come and Share your story on
the logical podcast Go go.

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I do want to delve into what
that process of you finding out

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and identifying for yourself
what your purpose in life is,

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which is medicine.
But before then, I do want to

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ask you to just Cher, if you're
willing to how it felt each of

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the first five times that you
took the test and you realized

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that you did not get the result
that you want.

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Because I think a lot of times
people talk about the final

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success, but I think it's also
really important to talk about,

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you know, exactly what your
mindset and also will your

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emotions were on each of those
five different occasions as

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well. 100% And I completely
agree with you, Ani.

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I think that on across the
board, people speak too much

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about success and they don't
speak about the failures.

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And So what tends to happen is
people that experience that

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failure or that rejection, they
begin to look down on themselves

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or they begin to try and force
themselves to get over something

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that realistically you should
take time to process.

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And so looking back on the five
failures that I experienced, I

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definitely was not, I didn't
feel resilient at the time.

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I definitely didn't feel like
somebody who had grit, to be

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very honest.
Those failures made me look

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within myself and almost
question my worth at times.

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To be very honest, the 1st 2
failures I experienced were not

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that bad because I still had
hope at that time.

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I was in secondary school when I
sat the first 3 attempts I made

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to get into medical school in
terms of those exams.

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And so when the 1st 2 didn't go
well, I was like OK, the third

227
00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:42,520
one is my last attempt to get
into medical school straight

228
00:12:42,520 --> 00:12:45,800
after my like secondary school
experience slash high school

229
00:12:45,800 --> 00:12:50,400
experience.
And I remember receiving the

230
00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:54,480
third rejection.
That's when it really hit for me

231
00:12:54,680 --> 00:12:59,560
because now it was like, OK, I'm
about to start university in

232
00:12:59,600 --> 00:13:03,640
three months from now.
And based on these grades, this

233
00:13:03,640 --> 00:13:06,800
results from this examination, I
know for a fact I will not get

234
00:13:06,800 --> 00:13:09,760
medicine.
And so it's funny, I remember,

235
00:13:09,960 --> 00:13:13,280
like I can vividly remember
being in the corner of my

236
00:13:13,280 --> 00:13:17,840
bedroom and crying my eye eyes
out because I felt like

237
00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:21,920
everything that I had spent the
past two years working towards

238
00:13:22,080 --> 00:13:24,000
had suddenly just gone down the
drain.

239
00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:27,600
Because to give you some even
more background, I wanted to

240
00:13:27,600 --> 00:13:31,160
attend medical school in the UK.
And so that's why I was sitting

241
00:13:31,160 --> 00:13:33,400
so many exams.
I sat what they called the B

242
00:13:33,400 --> 00:13:36,120
mat.
I sat the UK CAT and and then I

243
00:13:36,120 --> 00:13:38,080
also sat the Irish medical
exams.

244
00:13:38,280 --> 00:13:42,000
But The thing is I didn't go to
a private school and I wasn't

245
00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:45,400
connected with people who could
help me prepare my applications

246
00:13:45,640 --> 00:13:48,640
for the UK.
Also, the school I went to the,

247
00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:53,000
they weren't used to people
applying to the UK from 15.

248
00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:56,160
Really I was navigating
everything myself.

249
00:13:56,480 --> 00:13:59,760
I remember I would be to go to
my guidance counselor and say

250
00:13:59,760 --> 00:14:03,080
this is what they're asking of
me, this is what they recommend.

251
00:14:03,240 --> 00:14:06,160
And it was almost like two
people were working together to

252
00:14:06,160 --> 00:14:10,280
try and figure things out.
But because of that, I had to

253
00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:12,040
really teach myself a lot of
things.

254
00:14:12,040 --> 00:14:15,400
So for example, to sit the BMAT
exam, which would be required

255
00:14:15,400 --> 00:14:19,120
for the likes of like Oxbridge
as well as some other UK medical

256
00:14:19,200 --> 00:14:24,000
schools, I had to learn physics.
And because one of the sections

257
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:27,240
on that exam examines you on
biology, chemistry, physics and

258
00:14:27,240 --> 00:14:29,760
I think maths.
And at the time in school I was

259
00:14:29,760 --> 00:14:31,880
only taking biology and
chemistry.

260
00:14:32,200 --> 00:14:36,880
And so I like at the age of 16,
took it upon myself to learn

261
00:14:36,880 --> 00:14:39,920
physics all by myself.
I bought this psychics textbook

262
00:14:40,200 --> 00:14:43,080
and after a long day at school,
I would go home and treat

263
00:14:43,080 --> 00:14:46,080
physics like it was another
subject that I was taking in

264
00:14:46,080 --> 00:14:51,080
school and that like that level
of effort over 2 years.

265
00:14:51,400 --> 00:14:54,520
It took a lot out of me.
In a similar sense, I was

266
00:14:54,720 --> 00:14:58,600
preparing for for my final exam.
So it would be like an A level

267
00:14:58,600 --> 00:15:00,880
equivalent called the Leaving
Cert here in Ireland.

268
00:15:01,280 --> 00:15:04,800
And because I knew that I needed
like, impeccable grades to get

269
00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:08,360
into the likes of like Cambridge
or UCL or the likes of that for

270
00:15:08,360 --> 00:15:12,520
medicine, I had to work 10 times
harder than anybody around me.

271
00:15:12,520 --> 00:15:15,640
And most people here would only
start doing that work in their

272
00:15:15,640 --> 00:15:17,960
final year of like high school,
secondary school.

273
00:15:18,240 --> 00:15:21,520
But I started doing it in my
penultimate year.

274
00:15:21,520 --> 00:15:25,560
So I spent two years doing what
people usually do in one in

275
00:15:25,560 --> 00:15:27,960
terms of the amount of focus I
was giving it.

276
00:15:28,520 --> 00:15:31,120
And so I, I provide all that
context just to say that when I

277
00:15:31,120 --> 00:15:34,840
had that meltdown in my room
after the 3rd rejection, it was

278
00:15:34,840 --> 00:15:38,920
an accumulation of everything
hitting me that all the work

279
00:15:38,920 --> 00:15:41,120
that you've just spent the past
two years of your life

280
00:15:41,120 --> 00:15:43,720
committing to.
I had deleted social media for

281
00:15:43,720 --> 00:15:46,560
the entire year.
I had not seen my friends in a

282
00:15:46,560 --> 00:15:49,680
long time.
I sacrificed a lot and it seemed

283
00:15:49,680 --> 00:15:52,760
to all be for nothing.
And so I was distraught.

284
00:15:52,760 --> 00:15:57,680
To be very honest, I couldn't
really see any hope in my

285
00:15:57,680 --> 00:15:59,520
future.
I know it sounds really dramatic

286
00:15:59,520 --> 00:16:02,520
now that I like kind of look
back on it, but it's how I felt

287
00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:05,560
at the time.
I was really disappointed, you

288
00:16:05,560 --> 00:16:08,880
know, in myself and I didn't
really know what was the next

289
00:16:08,880 --> 00:16:11,640
step for me.
And it took a lot of courage for

290
00:16:11,640 --> 00:16:15,760
me to decide to sit my 4th exam,
which I did maybe like seven

291
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:18,400
months later.
So I did it in my first year of

292
00:16:18,400 --> 00:16:21,080
my undergraduate degree, which
is by medical health and life

293
00:16:21,080 --> 00:16:23,240
sciences.
And I remember when I sat that

294
00:16:23,240 --> 00:16:28,000
4th exam, I basically performed
worse than the third exam that I

295
00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:31,080
did in that.
And tell you the truth, Annie,

296
00:16:31,080 --> 00:16:35,080
that's when I gave up and I said
no, more medicine is not for me.

297
00:16:35,400 --> 00:16:37,800
A lot of people don't realize
this when they hear my story.

298
00:16:37,800 --> 00:16:39,960
They think that I just pushed
through the whole time.

299
00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:43,720
No, I completely said that I'm
walking away from this field.

300
00:16:43,720 --> 00:16:46,600
I told myself that I would
either do a PhD and like

301
00:16:46,600 --> 00:16:51,200
Physiology or else I would go
and study dentistry in Canada or

302
00:16:51,200 --> 00:16:54,000
something like that.
But that medicine was clearly

303
00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:56,320
not for me.
And I wasn't going to allow

304
00:16:56,320 --> 00:17:00,200
myself to keep going through the
process of trying and failing.

305
00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:04,040
Because in truth, after a while,
I mean after four times of

306
00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:06,880
trying to do something and it
doesn't work, you then start to

307
00:17:06,880 --> 00:17:10,359
feel like you are the failure.
I no longer saw failure as an

308
00:17:10,359 --> 00:17:13,200
experience.
I equated it with my identity.

309
00:17:13,240 --> 00:17:17,520
And I saw myself as somebody who
was of low worth because no

310
00:17:17,520 --> 00:17:20,640
matter how much I had tried to
apply myself, things don't seem

311
00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:22,480
to work out in the way that I
want to.

312
00:17:22,800 --> 00:17:26,760
And so I spent like the next
maybe two years or so really

313
00:17:26,760 --> 00:17:31,960
trying to avoid medicine.
I dismissed the even even the

314
00:17:32,040 --> 00:17:35,360
the prompt to grow myself in
terms of like, OK, you've

315
00:17:35,360 --> 00:17:37,640
experienced this thing, how
about we change mindset?

316
00:17:37,640 --> 00:17:39,760
I avoided thinking about it,
full stop.

317
00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:44,320
It wasn't until coming up to my
fifth attempt where I realized

318
00:17:44,320 --> 00:17:47,480
that I still feel like there's
something in me that's calling

319
00:17:47,480 --> 00:17:50,840
out to do medicine.
So maybe I do need to face that

320
00:17:50,840 --> 00:17:52,960
fear.
And honestly, it was in

321
00:17:52,960 --> 00:17:56,440
preparing for my 5th admission
exam that I realized how much

322
00:17:56,440 --> 00:17:58,480
the fear of failure was
paralyzing me.

323
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:03,160
I actually barely studied for
that exam because I was so

324
00:18:03,160 --> 00:18:07,080
afraid of doing bad in it and
that I almost self sabotage

325
00:18:07,080 --> 00:18:10,840
myself so that I wouldn't end up
doing bad or or doing good

326
00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:13,360
either way.
And it's funny because in that

327
00:18:13,360 --> 00:18:16,520
fifth exam I, I was so close.
I think I missed it by two

328
00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:19,720
points in that exam.
But that even that experience of

329
00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:22,800
getting so close to the mark,
for some reason, rather than me

330
00:18:22,800 --> 00:18:26,800
feeling like a failure, it made
me think, OK, if you can perform

331
00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:31,440
this well without like studying
like crazy, then what would

332
00:18:31,440 --> 00:18:35,040
happen if you were to just try
and give it a risk and see what

333
00:18:35,040 --> 00:18:37,080
happens?
And thankfully I did.

334
00:18:37,080 --> 00:18:42,560
And that's what culminated in my
6th entry exam, which was to

335
00:18:42,560 --> 00:18:45,680
God, successful.
So it's been a bit of a like

336
00:18:45,680 --> 00:18:49,400
roller coaster journey in terms
of emotions, feelings, but yeah,

337
00:18:49,400 --> 00:18:52,040
that's pretty much it.
Wow, what a roller coaster

338
00:18:52,040 --> 00:18:54,400
indeed.
And I actually did not realize

339
00:18:54,400 --> 00:18:55,640
how you staggered.
Like.

340
00:18:55,640 --> 00:18:57,600
Sounds like you took the first
three.

341
00:18:57,600 --> 00:19:00,000
They were taken before you
started your first university

342
00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:02,200
degree.
All with the hopes of getting in

343
00:19:02,200 --> 00:19:04,920
somewhere to do medicine as your
first university degree.

344
00:19:05,200 --> 00:19:08,360
I mean, he actually took some
time off and then retried again

345
00:19:08,360 --> 00:19:11,800
for 1/4 and 5th time whilst you
were at university doing your

346
00:19:11,800 --> 00:19:14,600
first degree.
There was actually a point where

347
00:19:14,600 --> 00:19:18,800
you decided to give up on even
thinking about doing medicine

348
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:22,360
and actually turning away from
the idea of you studying

349
00:19:22,360 --> 00:19:24,320
medicine at all in this
lifetime.

350
00:19:24,600 --> 00:19:28,560
What then made you take the
action to do that 5th and then

351
00:19:28,560 --> 00:19:32,000
that last sixth exam?
Yeah, that's a great question.

352
00:19:32,040 --> 00:19:36,520
I think that when I look back on
it, what made me do the 5th exam

353
00:19:36,520 --> 00:19:39,960
again, going back to the fact
that I'm a person of faith, I

354
00:19:39,960 --> 00:19:43,880
started really feeling appalling
that you need to try again

355
00:19:43,920 --> 00:19:45,760
because medicine is still for
you.

356
00:19:45,840 --> 00:19:49,280
And it was something I really
tried to ignore.

357
00:19:49,280 --> 00:19:53,200
But I, again, I'm a big believer
that when you are quote UN quote

358
00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:57,080
destined for something, you
can't run away from it even if

359
00:19:57,080 --> 00:19:59,400
you try.
It's that whole thing of if it's

360
00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:02,320
meant to be, it will be.
People tend to speak about that

361
00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:05,280
in a romantic setting, but I
actually experienced that in a

362
00:20:05,280 --> 00:20:10,360
career light that if it's meant
to be like, no matter what, it

363
00:20:10,360 --> 00:20:12,400
will be.
And that's what I experienced.

364
00:20:12,480 --> 00:20:14,920
When it came to the medicine
thing, because again, I spent a

365
00:20:14,920 --> 00:20:19,040
lot of time, I was preparing to
graduate from university coming

366
00:20:19,040 --> 00:20:22,280
up to the fifth exam because I
sat that one in my final year of

367
00:20:22,280 --> 00:20:26,200
my undergraduate degree.
And towards that time, I was

368
00:20:26,200 --> 00:20:28,640
just thinking, OK, what am I
going to do once I graduate?

369
00:20:28,640 --> 00:20:30,600
Am I going to work in a
scientific lab?

370
00:20:30,920 --> 00:20:34,480
Am I going to do a PhD?
Will I pursue dentistry?

371
00:20:34,720 --> 00:20:37,600
And so again, I was just
spending a lot of time praying

372
00:20:37,600 --> 00:20:41,160
about it like to God, to Jesus,
and being like, OK, what's next

373
00:20:41,160 --> 00:20:43,360
for me?
And I felt like that was really

374
00:20:43,360 --> 00:20:46,920
illuminated to me as the path
that I was supposed to take,

375
00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:51,240
even though within myself, I
felt like I don't want to put

376
00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:53,760
myself through this again.
I felt like something bigger

377
00:20:53,760 --> 00:20:57,080
than me was calling me to it.
But funnily enough that you say

378
00:20:57,080 --> 00:21:00,040
for the 6th exam, what pushed me
to study for that?

379
00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:04,400
So I mentioned my dad
previously, he was a huge, huge

380
00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:07,560
influence in my life in pushing
me to believe in myself.

381
00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:13,400
And unfortunately, he passed
away shortly after my 5th exam.

382
00:21:14,160 --> 00:21:17,240
And that was very, very, very
difficult for me.

383
00:21:17,240 --> 00:21:21,560
So I think I received the
results for that exam in August

384
00:21:21,560 --> 00:21:26,600
time and my dad had passed away.
He later passed in November of

385
00:21:26,600 --> 00:21:29,600
that same year.
That was 2021 when that

386
00:21:29,600 --> 00:21:33,280
happened.
I was obviously heartbroken and

387
00:21:33,720 --> 00:21:37,280
it was a really, really, really
difficult time in my life.

388
00:21:38,360 --> 00:21:44,520
But it's funny because instead
of his death destabilizing me

389
00:21:44,520 --> 00:21:47,440
and making me feel like, well,
it definitely did destabilize me

390
00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:50,480
in ways, but instead of it
making me feel like I need to

391
00:21:50,680 --> 00:21:55,040
steer away from the things that
I want and just take time, I

392
00:21:55,040 --> 00:22:01,040
felt this news like surge of I
need to try and if not for my

393
00:22:01,040 --> 00:22:02,720
sake, then for the sake of my
dad.

394
00:22:02,720 --> 00:22:05,440
And it's funny because a lot of
people will hear this and they

395
00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:08,660
might think, oh, maybe my dad
was like, you know, quote UN

396
00:22:08,660 --> 00:22:10,360
quote forcing me towards
medicine.

397
00:22:10,440 --> 00:22:13,320
He was never the the one who
made me want to be a doctor.

398
00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:17,680
There's no doctors in my family.
I decided all by myself that I

399
00:22:17,680 --> 00:22:20,280
wanted to study medicine.
He was just supportive

400
00:22:20,280 --> 00:22:24,640
throughout and I just remembered
how much he believed that I was

401
00:22:24,640 --> 00:22:26,960
eventually going to get in.
Kind of makes me emotional

402
00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:31,720
thinking about it now.
I remember when I got my 5th

403
00:22:31,720 --> 00:22:35,760
examination results and I found
out that I I was not going to

404
00:22:35,760 --> 00:22:37,920
get in because I missed it by
two points.

405
00:22:38,520 --> 00:22:41,560
I had already told my dad that I
was probably going to get in

406
00:22:43,000 --> 00:22:46,280
because the points that I had
gotten that year, if I had

407
00:22:46,280 --> 00:22:49,080
gotten those same points one
year prior, I would have

408
00:22:49,080 --> 00:22:52,440
actually gotten admission.
So the points pretty much like

409
00:22:52,480 --> 00:22:54,760
elevated and threshold
increased.

410
00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:59,040
And so before the offers went
out, I told him that I think I'm

411
00:22:59,040 --> 00:23:00,960
going to get into medicine this
year.

412
00:23:01,160 --> 00:23:05,440
And I had started preparing,
like to move to the town for

413
00:23:05,440 --> 00:23:08,800
that university literally
started like learning how to

414
00:23:08,800 --> 00:23:11,640
drive because it's a type of
town where you kind of need to

415
00:23:11,640 --> 00:23:13,640
drive.
This is not reliable public

416
00:23:13,640 --> 00:23:16,960
transport.
I started buying duvet bed

417
00:23:16,960 --> 00:23:19,840
dressings.
I really prepared myself for

418
00:23:20,120 --> 00:23:23,680
this new stage of my life.
I literally had started planning

419
00:23:23,680 --> 00:23:27,240
a going away party and I sent
invites out to my friends

420
00:23:27,240 --> 00:23:31,720
saying, guys, I'm about to move
because I've gotten into this

421
00:23:31,800 --> 00:23:35,840
university to study medicine.
And then of course, the offer

422
00:23:35,840 --> 00:23:38,640
day came.
I didn't receive an offer.

423
00:23:38,920 --> 00:23:42,240
And I was shocked because I
didn't expect that to happen.

424
00:23:42,480 --> 00:23:45,640
But the bigger thing was I had
this fear of what's going to

425
00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:48,960
happen.
Now if I'm to tell my dad that I

426
00:23:48,960 --> 00:23:52,240
actually didn't get in because I
know that he's already gotten

427
00:23:52,240 --> 00:23:55,640
really excited about this.
I'm really happy about it and

428
00:23:55,640 --> 00:23:58,920
has told his friends etcetera.
And so I actually delayed

429
00:23:58,920 --> 00:24:00,720
telling him for maybe like a
month.

430
00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:03,560
I was really afraid of what his
reaction might be.

431
00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:06,320
Not because he would be the type
of person to give a scary

432
00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:10,080
reaction, but just because I
fear disappointing him after

433
00:24:10,080 --> 00:24:13,000
getting his hopes up.
And I'll never forget the phone

434
00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:15,120
call that I had with my dad that
day.

435
00:24:15,920 --> 00:24:20,840
I told him and my voice was
shaking and his response was out

436
00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:23,440
of this world.
It was literally just, that's

437
00:24:23,440 --> 00:24:25,320
okay, you're going to get it the
next time.

438
00:24:25,840 --> 00:24:28,880
He he didn't seem fazed by it in
the slightest.

439
00:24:29,080 --> 00:24:32,880
There was no hint of
disappointment in his his tone.

440
00:24:33,120 --> 00:24:37,800
He was just so confident in me
and in my ability and he, he

441
00:24:37,800 --> 00:24:40,320
just saw it as another obstacle
in the road.

442
00:24:40,320 --> 00:24:44,840
And when he died, I really
reflected on that and I told

443
00:24:44,840 --> 00:24:48,600
myself that if he believed so
much in me, then I owe it to

444
00:24:48,600 --> 00:24:51,000
myself to believe in myself as
well.

445
00:24:51,000 --> 00:24:53,000
And then I owe it to him to try
again.

446
00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:56,640
And so I did.
And it's so funny because the

447
00:24:56,640 --> 00:25:02,400
mindset I went into that 6th
exam with was the mindset of I

448
00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:05,520
don't care actually, if I fail
this time, I'm going to keep

449
00:25:05,520 --> 00:25:07,920
trying.
If it takes me 10 more attempts

450
00:25:08,160 --> 00:25:11,880
to get into medicine, I will sit
this exam 10 more times.

451
00:25:12,400 --> 00:25:16,880
I finally had let go of my fear
of failure when I sat that 6th

452
00:25:16,880 --> 00:25:19,000
exam.
And it's so funny because that

453
00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:21,440
ended up being the exam that
worked out.

454
00:25:21,440 --> 00:25:24,480
So it's almost like in a funny
way, it's almost like life was

455
00:25:24,480 --> 00:25:26,280
trying to teach me something
through that.

456
00:25:26,280 --> 00:25:29,280
And once the lesson was learned,
it was like, OK, now you can

457
00:25:29,280 --> 00:25:33,520
move forward.
Wow, I'm getting goosebumps

458
00:25:33,520 --> 00:25:35,680
hearing you tell that story.
Go, go.

459
00:25:35,680 --> 00:25:39,200
And your father, what a loving,
encouraging man.

460
00:25:39,560 --> 00:25:42,880
I mean, over the course of our
conversation so far, it really

461
00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:46,800
jumped out to me that your faith
and I saw the loving support,

462
00:25:46,800 --> 00:25:51,000
the kind support of your father
were two really instrumental

463
00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:53,840
pillars that really how do you
got along that journey?

464
00:25:54,040 --> 00:25:57,080
Thank you for sharing that.
And I said thank you for talking

465
00:25:57,080 --> 00:25:59,680
about losing your father.
I know that's a really difficult

466
00:25:59,680 --> 00:26:03,440
topic when you lost your father,
and I say when there was still

467
00:26:03,440 --> 00:26:05,880
the uncertainty about whether or
not you're going to be able to

468
00:26:05,880 --> 00:26:10,560
go to medical school, how did
you keep yourself active and

469
00:26:10,560 --> 00:26:13,360
productive and working towards a
goal?

470
00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:17,760
Because I think those are two
huge life events that can happen

471
00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:21,600
in a person's life, and I think
some people can very easily, and

472
00:26:21,640 --> 00:26:25,200
I say very understandably, just
take some time off before really

473
00:26:25,200 --> 00:26:29,520
pushing themselves again.
What gave you that grit to just

474
00:26:29,520 --> 00:26:32,920
keep going straight away?
Yeah, Well, great question.

475
00:26:32,960 --> 00:26:37,120
Honestly, I think that a part of
it was, I mean, it wasn't

476
00:26:37,120 --> 00:26:39,600
immediate.
I sat the exam in March and my

477
00:26:39,600 --> 00:26:43,080
dad had passed in November.
So maybe there was like a like a

478
00:26:43,080 --> 00:26:48,040
four or five month gap in
between, but I think a big part

479
00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:50,960
of it was leaning on people for
support.

480
00:26:50,960 --> 00:26:54,160
And I was really thankful that
when my dad passed, my friends

481
00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:57,600
were of a huge support to me.
They really showed up for me.

482
00:26:57,600 --> 00:27:02,200
And honestly, Annie, I, I had to
learn how to rely on people for

483
00:27:02,200 --> 00:27:04,040
support.
I think that was one of the

484
00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:06,600
greatest lessons that my dad's
death taught me.

485
00:27:06,680 --> 00:27:10,480
I used to be a very independent
person, almost hyper

486
00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:13,000
independent.
If I was going through something

487
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:15,280
low mentally, I wouldn't share
it with anybody.

488
00:27:15,280 --> 00:27:20,280
I would stick to myself and I
would try my best to find my way

489
00:27:20,280 --> 00:27:22,880
out of whatever tunnel I was in
alone.

490
00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:26,120
And I remember for the first
time in my life, when my dad

491
00:27:26,120 --> 00:27:29,840
passed, I was like, I don't
think I have the to do this

492
00:27:29,840 --> 00:27:32,240
alone.
I also feared what would happen

493
00:27:32,240 --> 00:27:35,800
to my mental health if I tried
to do it alone.

494
00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:39,040
Because in the past I dealt
with, I dealt with mental health

495
00:27:39,040 --> 00:27:41,640
struggles.
I used to deal with depression

496
00:27:41,640 --> 00:27:44,720
when I was younger.
And so I was really afraid that

497
00:27:44,720 --> 00:27:50,840
it would pretty much swallow me
if I was to try to face it by

498
00:27:50,840 --> 00:27:53,560
myself, especially after such a
huge life event.

499
00:27:54,000 --> 00:27:57,400
And so I remember at that time,
I started proactively reaching

500
00:27:57,400 --> 00:28:00,880
out to my friends and I would
ask them, would you be happy to

501
00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:02,880
come over and spend the day with
me?

502
00:28:03,080 --> 00:28:06,080
I would call people when I felt
like I needed to talk about

503
00:28:06,080 --> 00:28:08,400
things and talk about what I was
going through.

504
00:28:08,400 --> 00:28:12,160
I would intentionally try to
leave the house at times in

505
00:28:12,160 --> 00:28:17,440
order to change my environment.
I was really, really intentional

506
00:28:17,440 --> 00:28:21,760
about ensuring that the support
systems in my life were actually

507
00:28:21,760 --> 00:28:24,480
able to support me and they
weren't just there.

508
00:28:24,480 --> 00:28:27,760
Because I think sometimes what
we can do, especially as young

509
00:28:27,760 --> 00:28:32,000
people, is we see these support
systems as just infrastructure

510
00:28:32,120 --> 00:28:35,840
rather than things that we can
actually use and things that we

511
00:28:35,840 --> 00:28:37,760
should use.
Really.

512
00:28:37,760 --> 00:28:41,200
I'm grateful looking back now
that I made those decisions to

513
00:28:41,400 --> 00:28:46,280
actually like ask for help and
ask people if they wouldn't mind

514
00:28:46,280 --> 00:28:49,440
having a conversation with me or
going for coffee or this or

515
00:28:49,440 --> 00:28:51,480
that.
Because going forward now, it's

516
00:28:51,480 --> 00:28:53,800
really taught me a lot.
I think in a career like

517
00:28:53,800 --> 00:28:58,160
medicine, people shrink because
of mental health battles.

518
00:28:58,600 --> 00:29:02,320
It's really well known how high,
like, suicide rates are within

519
00:29:02,320 --> 00:29:05,480
this profession because people
don't rely on other people for

520
00:29:05,480 --> 00:29:08,760
help, and they really go through
a lot of things alone and by

521
00:29:08,760 --> 00:29:11,320
themselves.
And so I think that the reason

522
00:29:11,320 --> 00:29:15,440
why I was able to get back on my
feet so quickly is because I had

523
00:29:15,440 --> 00:29:18,120
people holding up my arms.
Do you know what I mean?

524
00:29:18,280 --> 00:29:21,720
It wasn't like I was standing up
by myself, but it's like people

525
00:29:21,720 --> 00:29:24,000
around me were like, OK, I'll
take her elbow.

526
00:29:24,280 --> 00:29:27,160
I'll take her other elbow.
Let's see if we can get her

527
00:29:27,160 --> 00:29:28,160
standing.
And so.

528
00:29:28,160 --> 00:29:31,680
Yeah, until today.
I'm so grateful to all of my

529
00:29:31,680 --> 00:29:35,600
friends, all of my family, my
church, the community around me

530
00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:39,840
who really held me up at a time
where realistically, I, I should

531
00:29:39,840 --> 00:29:43,600
not have been able to have been
able to thrive in those periods

532
00:29:43,600 --> 00:29:46,240
of time.
So yeah, I'm, I'm really, really

533
00:29:46,240 --> 00:29:49,560
grateful.
Shout out to all the people who

534
00:29:49,560 --> 00:29:52,680
are there to hold you up and who
gave up their time to give that

535
00:29:52,680 --> 00:29:54,680
energy to you in such a
challenging time.

536
00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:58,520
I really love how you shared
about that mindset shift that

537
00:29:58,520 --> 00:30:01,200
you had internally of being
someone who used to be very

538
00:30:01,200 --> 00:30:04,840
independent and never asking for
help, to someone who actually

539
00:30:04,840 --> 00:30:08,640
then actively seeked time,
attention, support from other

540
00:30:08,640 --> 00:30:10,640
people when you knew that you
needed it.

541
00:30:10,920 --> 00:30:13,080
Can I ask what triggered that in
you?

542
00:30:13,360 --> 00:30:15,280
How did that mindset shift
happen for you?

543
00:30:15,280 --> 00:30:17,560
Was it something that you've
read about or did someone in

544
00:30:17,560 --> 00:30:19,040
your circle will recommend it
for you?

545
00:30:19,720 --> 00:30:24,240
I had a great friend who when my
dad passed away, she said

546
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:27,320
something very interesting in
one of her messages to me.

547
00:30:27,320 --> 00:30:31,240
She was like, let me know how I
can help you.

548
00:30:31,600 --> 00:30:35,600
Like let me know in what
capacity I can help you.

549
00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:39,440
And I think most of the time
where people reach out, they

550
00:30:39,440 --> 00:30:43,480
tend to say things like, if you
need anything, let me know or

551
00:30:43,520 --> 00:30:45,520
I'm here for you.
It's almost like these

552
00:30:45,520 --> 00:30:48,280
statements that are well
meaning, but they can come

553
00:30:48,280 --> 00:30:52,160
across a bit empty at times
because a person won't really

554
00:30:52,160 --> 00:30:53,960
know what to do with those
statements.

555
00:30:54,200 --> 00:30:56,440
But she specifically like gave
examples.

556
00:30:56,440 --> 00:30:59,240
I think she was like, if you
want me to get groceries for

557
00:30:59,240 --> 00:31:03,520
you, if you need somebody to
talk to you just tell me

558
00:31:03,520 --> 00:31:08,800
specifically how I can help you.
And that reframed my mind.

559
00:31:08,800 --> 00:31:12,480
I don't know what it was about
like hearing her say that, but

560
00:31:12,480 --> 00:31:15,800
it made me realize that you can
be specific in your request to

561
00:31:15,800 --> 00:31:17,560
people.
Your friends are in your life

562
00:31:17,560 --> 00:31:20,000
for a reason.
And so you can ask them.

563
00:31:20,000 --> 00:31:23,920
Like, for example, would you
mind popping into Tesco for me

564
00:31:24,160 --> 00:31:27,240
and getting me like ingredients
for dinner this evening?

565
00:31:27,240 --> 00:31:29,280
Or would you mind coming to cook
for me?

566
00:31:30,040 --> 00:31:33,680
I don't really know what it was,
but it just really made me think

567
00:31:33,680 --> 00:31:37,160
that, okay, this is something
that I actually can do.

568
00:31:37,160 --> 00:31:41,280
And yes, it requires me to be
more vulnerable by asking people

569
00:31:41,280 --> 00:31:45,720
to do things that I quote, UN
quote, should be able to do for

570
00:31:45,720 --> 00:31:48,600
myself.
But if somebody is offering to

571
00:31:48,600 --> 00:31:52,320
help me in a specific capacity,
then I would be, it would be

572
00:31:52,320 --> 00:31:55,240
silly of me not to take that
opportunity.

573
00:31:55,520 --> 00:31:59,760
But also I did a lot of like
reading around that time and I

574
00:31:59,760 --> 00:32:02,960
read some books about grief.
So there's a book that CS Lewis

575
00:32:02,960 --> 00:32:07,640
writes about grief and I think
he lost his wife when he wrote

576
00:32:07,640 --> 00:32:10,280
that book.
I can't remember exactly what

577
00:32:10,280 --> 00:32:14,200
the book is called, though the
word little is somewhere in the

578
00:32:14,200 --> 00:32:16,880
title anyways.
But I remember within that book,

579
00:32:16,960 --> 00:32:19,200
he describes his experience of
grief.

580
00:32:19,200 --> 00:32:22,920
And he describes how you're
angry when people ask you how

581
00:32:22,920 --> 00:32:25,920
you are and you are angry when
people don't ask you.

582
00:32:26,320 --> 00:32:31,000
And I just felt understood by
the things that he was saying

583
00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:34,640
and describing because
especially being a young person

584
00:32:34,640 --> 00:32:38,400
losing a parent, most of my
friends have never lost like a

585
00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:41,800
parent or else they haven't
experienced loss because I mean,

586
00:32:42,120 --> 00:32:46,040
when you're in your 20s, it's
not a common thing that people

587
00:32:46,040 --> 00:32:49,120
would experience, at least in
this side of the world.

588
00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:53,240
And so I felt very alone.
And I turned to things like

589
00:32:53,240 --> 00:32:56,720
books, I turned to YouTube
videos, I turned to things

590
00:32:56,720 --> 00:32:59,120
online like, you know, the five
stages of grief.

591
00:32:59,120 --> 00:33:02,400
I was looking for help in as
many places as possible, which

592
00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:06,800
is why I try my best now to be
open to speaking about it when

593
00:33:06,800 --> 00:33:09,000
people are also going through
the same.

594
00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:12,920
Because I know how it felt like
in looking for that sense of am

595
00:33:12,920 --> 00:33:15,520
I the only one who's feeling the
the way I am right now and not

596
00:33:15,520 --> 00:33:17,880
being able to find those
sources?

597
00:33:18,120 --> 00:33:22,280
So I'm sure that part of the
reading that I did encouraged me

598
00:33:22,280 --> 00:33:27,360
to lean on people around me as
well, because I think that it

599
00:33:27,360 --> 00:33:32,120
would have been a much more
difficult journey if I hadn't

600
00:33:32,280 --> 00:33:36,040
sought that advice or that
counsel from, albeit strangers,

601
00:33:36,040 --> 00:33:37,760
but people who were able to
help.

602
00:33:38,760 --> 00:33:42,440
I love how you were able to seek
out those pieces of information

603
00:33:42,440 --> 00:33:44,520
yourself.
And I guess part of the healing

604
00:33:44,520 --> 00:33:48,560
journey is also the act of
looking for things resources

605
00:33:48,560 --> 00:33:51,040
that can help you get out of a
certain mindset.

606
00:33:51,080 --> 00:33:54,040
And I so as you mentioned how
you're now openly sharing that

607
00:33:54,280 --> 00:33:58,280
in order to help other people, I
want to ask you a bit more about

608
00:33:58,280 --> 00:34:01,440
your nonprofit achieve with a go
go.

609
00:34:01,800 --> 00:34:05,520
You have over 400,000 people in
your community.

610
00:34:05,520 --> 00:34:09,480
What gives you the motivation to
run that alongside your very

611
00:34:09,480 --> 00:34:12,520
demanding schedule as a full
time medical student?

612
00:34:13,719 --> 00:34:17,159
Honestly, I think I've always
been somebody who's driven by

613
00:34:17,159 --> 00:34:23,360
social justice, by quality, and
by seeing everybody on the same

614
00:34:23,360 --> 00:34:26,880
level playing field.
When I was like 16 years old, I

615
00:34:26,880 --> 00:34:30,679
remember when the Syrian refugee
crisis was happening, I

616
00:34:30,679 --> 00:34:34,120
approached teachers in my school
and I was like, I want us to do

617
00:34:34,199 --> 00:34:38,000
a refugee awareness day.
Because these people, their

618
00:34:38,000 --> 00:34:40,679
voices need to be heard.
Their stories need to be put to

619
00:34:40,679 --> 00:34:43,639
the forefront.
And I have always had that

620
00:34:43,639 --> 00:34:47,679
within me, that sense of wanting
to amplify voices that are

621
00:34:47,679 --> 00:34:50,480
otherwise not really listened to
in society.

622
00:34:50,520 --> 00:34:54,000
Of course, medicine is a huge
way of being able to do that,

623
00:34:54,560 --> 00:35:00,240
but for some reason I saw it as
I, I, I could see that wherever,

624
00:35:00,240 --> 00:35:03,320
whatever field I'd be able to
quote UN quote activate that

625
00:35:03,320 --> 00:35:06,480
side of myself in, it would be
outside of medicine.

626
00:35:06,480 --> 00:35:08,760
Or at least it would be
alongside medicine because I'm

627
00:35:08,760 --> 00:35:12,400
also interested in HealthEquity,
extremely interested in it, but

628
00:35:12,400 --> 00:35:15,120
I knew that not it might be in
another area.

629
00:35:15,120 --> 00:35:19,560
So it's funny, when I started
posting online and growing my

630
00:35:19,560 --> 00:35:22,840
audience, one of the things I
started noticing was that people

631
00:35:22,840 --> 00:35:26,800
would DM me and they would say,
I love your story.

632
00:35:27,000 --> 00:35:30,360
I'm really, really inspired to
work harder now or to not give

633
00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:34,560
up on my dream, but I feel like
I don't have what it takes.

634
00:35:35,560 --> 00:35:39,280
And I kept hearing that
narrative over and over and over

635
00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:42,800
of people who clearly wanted
more for themselves, but they

636
00:35:42,800 --> 00:35:44,720
didn't think they were
intelligent enough.

637
00:35:44,720 --> 00:35:46,480
They didn't think they were
smart enough.

638
00:35:46,760 --> 00:35:51,120
They felt hindered or held back
by the circumstances in life

639
00:35:51,120 --> 00:35:53,320
that they were in.
And it really started to bother

640
00:35:53,320 --> 00:35:57,240
me because I started to think
about the fact that these are

641
00:35:57,240 --> 00:36:01,920
people who have such bright
potential and such great futures

642
00:36:01,920 --> 00:36:04,240
ahead of them.
And if they choose to believe

643
00:36:04,240 --> 00:36:07,280
these narratives, they're never
going to apply themselves and

644
00:36:07,280 --> 00:36:09,920
therefore they're never going to
achieve the things they want.

645
00:36:09,920 --> 00:36:13,040
It almost becomes this self
fulfilling prophecy.

646
00:36:13,160 --> 00:36:15,880
That's when I decided that I
wanted to be proactive about

647
00:36:15,880 --> 00:36:19,920
doing something about it and
forming some sort of structure

648
00:36:19,920 --> 00:36:21,720
where we're able to address
that.

649
00:36:21,720 --> 00:36:24,600
And so that's kind of where
Achieve with Al Gogol was born,

650
00:36:24,600 --> 00:36:29,080
where I decided that I wanted to
give people the tools in terms

651
00:36:29,080 --> 00:36:31,240
of education.
Because I think people that come

652
00:36:31,240 --> 00:36:34,000
from backgrounds that are not as
privileged, they don't know a

653
00:36:34,000 --> 00:36:37,520
lot of the things that are
needed to strive in the

654
00:36:37,520 --> 00:36:41,080
workplace or to strive in
education because these things

655
00:36:41,080 --> 00:36:43,280
are just not automatically
passed down.

656
00:36:43,280 --> 00:36:46,840
For example, if you have parents
who are immigrants, when they

657
00:36:46,840 --> 00:36:49,600
came to the country, they
probably weren't thinking about

658
00:36:49,720 --> 00:36:54,640
how do we like thrive in the
workplace and become C-Suite

659
00:36:54,640 --> 00:36:56,240
level.
No, they were thinking of

660
00:36:56,240 --> 00:36:58,360
survival.
They were thinking, how do we

661
00:36:58,360 --> 00:37:01,560
provide food on the table for
like, for our children?

662
00:37:01,560 --> 00:37:04,520
And so a lot of people who come
from whether it's backgrounds

663
00:37:04,520 --> 00:37:07,600
like immigrant backgrounds,
crowns, or else maybe they come

664
00:37:07,600 --> 00:37:11,280
from a sector of society that is
just underserved in one way or

665
00:37:11,280 --> 00:37:13,000
another.
They don't know a lot of things

666
00:37:13,000 --> 00:37:16,080
that people who do come from
more privileged backgrounds

667
00:37:16,080 --> 00:37:17,560
know.
And I wanted to share the

668
00:37:17,560 --> 00:37:20,000
information that I myself have
learned over time.

669
00:37:20,000 --> 00:37:22,720
I don't come from a super
privileged background, but I

670
00:37:22,720 --> 00:37:25,400
think that through the
experiences that I've had, for

671
00:37:25,400 --> 00:37:28,440
example, my experience with
failure, because I learned so

672
00:37:28,440 --> 00:37:31,880
much through that experience,
I've just picked up different

673
00:37:31,880 --> 00:37:34,840
lessons along the way and I
wanted to share it with people.

674
00:37:35,120 --> 00:37:39,600
But I also wanted to connect
young people with others who

675
00:37:39,600 --> 00:37:43,400
have experienced success but
come from relatable backgrounds.

676
00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:47,040
And So what we do as an
organization is our main.

677
00:37:47,040 --> 00:37:49,840
Our main goal is to help
students believe in themselves

678
00:37:50,080 --> 00:37:53,240
and excel in education and
students as well as young

679
00:37:53,240 --> 00:37:56,520
professionals.
And what we do is we hold

680
00:37:56,760 --> 00:38:00,800
regular, like at least on a
monthly basis, sessions where we

681
00:38:00,800 --> 00:38:03,400
are teaching people things that
they might need to know.

682
00:38:03,400 --> 00:38:07,440
For example, skills like how to
communicate in an effective

683
00:38:07,440 --> 00:38:11,920
manner, how to study in a way
that will ensure that you retain

684
00:38:11,920 --> 00:38:15,800
the information that you're
reading, how to believe in

685
00:38:15,800 --> 00:38:17,800
yourself when something goes
wrong.

686
00:38:18,200 --> 00:38:20,800
It's pretty much informal
education that we do.

687
00:38:21,160 --> 00:38:24,640
We get sometimes guest speakers
to come in and share their

688
00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:28,240
experiences or share their
expertise or their knowledge.

689
00:38:28,520 --> 00:38:32,520
And we try to inspire people to
know that, OK, if that person

690
00:38:32,520 --> 00:38:36,760
could do it and I can relate to
an element of that person, then

691
00:38:36,760 --> 00:38:38,840
surely that means that I can do
it too.

692
00:38:38,840 --> 00:38:42,000
But the interesting thing that's
come from it is also we're

693
00:38:42,000 --> 00:38:46,680
building a a strong community of
young people who want more for

694
00:38:46,680 --> 00:38:50,200
themselves and are seeking
connection with other young

695
00:38:50,200 --> 00:38:53,040
people who also want the same
for themselves.

696
00:38:53,360 --> 00:38:55,640
And that's something that I
actually only realized by

697
00:38:55,640 --> 00:38:58,640
starting the organization and
running our events and asking

698
00:38:58,640 --> 00:39:00,720
for feedback.
And people were like one of my

699
00:39:00,720 --> 00:39:03,280
favorite things about attending
the event, whether it was an

700
00:39:03,280 --> 00:39:07,400
online one or an in person one,
was the community that I have

701
00:39:07,480 --> 00:39:10,200
just been connected to.
People have made friends with

702
00:39:10,200 --> 00:39:12,960
each other.
People have formed a network

703
00:39:12,960 --> 00:39:15,520
that they might not otherwise
have had access to.

704
00:39:16,000 --> 00:39:19,600
We had an event actually just on
Monday, so like 3 or 4 days ago

705
00:39:19,680 --> 00:39:21,600
at the German Embassy here in
Ireland.

706
00:39:21,600 --> 00:39:25,840
So we did a collaboration with
them and one of the members of

707
00:39:25,840 --> 00:39:29,880
our organization came up to me
and she said I attended the goal

708
00:39:29,880 --> 00:39:32,320
setting dinner that you guys
held in December.

709
00:39:32,640 --> 00:39:36,200
And one of the girls that I met
at the dinner, she decided to

710
00:39:36,440 --> 00:39:39,720
help me out because I told her
that I was going to start a book

711
00:39:39,720 --> 00:39:42,320
club.
And so she offered to design A

712
00:39:42,320 --> 00:39:47,240
logo for me for free and to help
me develop, I know, for free.

713
00:39:47,240 --> 00:39:50,920
And I was like, I was so touched
by that because these are two

714
00:39:50,920 --> 00:39:52,840
strangers who would not be
connected.

715
00:39:52,840 --> 00:39:55,880
And all of a sudden they're
helping each other achieve their

716
00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:58,720
goals and accomplish the things
that they really want for

717
00:39:58,720 --> 00:40:01,080
themselves.
And so we're really trying to

718
00:40:01,080 --> 00:40:04,680
build that sense of success
isn't something that you do

719
00:40:04,680 --> 00:40:06,280
alone.
It's what you do with people

720
00:40:06,280 --> 00:40:08,200
around you.
And it's something that you do

721
00:40:08,200 --> 00:40:11,720
by learning from people who've
already gone ahead of you.

722
00:40:12,360 --> 00:40:15,680
And So what we're doing now is
we are pretty much trying to

723
00:40:15,680 --> 00:40:18,320
increase our membership.
We're trying to encourage young

724
00:40:18,320 --> 00:40:21,240
people who want more for
themselves and want to be

725
00:40:21,240 --> 00:40:25,560
connected to a community to join
us and to plug into the things

726
00:40:25,560 --> 00:40:28,000
we're doing.
Because at the end of the day,

727
00:40:28,560 --> 00:40:32,400
education is, is it's power.
Knowledge is freedom.

728
00:40:32,400 --> 00:40:35,280
So the more you know, the more
you're able to thrive.

729
00:40:35,280 --> 00:40:39,320
And my passion is truly to equal
this playing field.

730
00:40:39,320 --> 00:40:41,720
I'm a huge believer in
educational equity.

731
00:40:42,400 --> 00:40:46,240
I think it's unfortunate that
certain groups in society really

732
00:40:46,240 --> 00:40:49,840
don't have access to things that
other groups are almost born

733
00:40:49,840 --> 00:40:52,200
with.
And I think that education is is

734
00:40:52,200 --> 00:40:55,360
1 area where it's just not
acceptable for that inequity to

735
00:40:55,360 --> 00:40:58,840
exist.
I think that for a certainty

736
00:40:59,640 --> 00:41:02,880
when it comes to the ability to
learn, because it increases your

737
00:41:02,880 --> 00:41:06,360
earning potential, it increases
the respect that people in

738
00:41:06,360 --> 00:41:09,600
society have for you.
It's pretty much the key to

739
00:41:09,600 --> 00:41:11,680
everything.
And so I just want to see a

740
00:41:11,680 --> 00:41:16,320
world where people know as much
as they need to know and are

741
00:41:16,320 --> 00:41:19,480
able to have greater prospects
for their future as a result of

742
00:41:19,480 --> 00:41:22,720
that.
I absolutely agree with that

743
00:41:22,720 --> 00:41:28,240
because education just really
opens up the surface area of

744
00:41:28,240 --> 00:41:30,920
potential.
But a person could have and it

745
00:41:30,920 --> 00:41:34,000
sounds like you have a very
active community as well and

746
00:41:34,000 --> 00:41:36,600
that you have lovely built over
the past few years.

747
00:41:36,960 --> 00:41:38,600
I'll go go.
What have you learned about

748
00:41:38,600 --> 00:41:42,720
yourself over the course of
creating Achieve with a Go Go?

749
00:41:43,920 --> 00:41:49,480
Oh, what have I learned about
myself since creating this?

750
00:41:50,080 --> 00:41:52,880
This is a great question.
Going to think about this now.

751
00:41:53,560 --> 00:41:56,960
Interestingly, in the course of
creating achieve with a go go, I

752
00:41:56,960 --> 00:41:58,800
have learned about my
weaknesses.

753
00:41:59,600 --> 00:42:04,000
I think being somebody who was
very hyper independent and has

754
00:42:04,000 --> 00:42:07,560
been that way for most of my
life, you sometimes fool

755
00:42:07,560 --> 00:42:11,160
yourself into thinking you can
do everything and you can't

756
00:42:11,160 --> 00:42:15,640
because I've been so used to
being the person who is able to.

757
00:42:15,720 --> 00:42:17,320
Like, I think this is a problem
sometimes.

758
00:42:17,320 --> 00:42:20,880
If you're a quote UN quote all
rounder type of person, you have

759
00:42:20,880 --> 00:42:24,080
a lot of different skills.
You don't realize that just

760
00:42:24,080 --> 00:42:26,920
because you can do a lot doesn't
mean you're the best person to

761
00:42:26,920 --> 00:42:34,480
do those respective things.
Can relate to that for sure.

762
00:42:35,840 --> 00:42:39,680
And so I think I've really
learned that, yeah, I can't do

763
00:42:39,680 --> 00:42:43,640
everything well.
And it's in fact important to

764
00:42:43,640 --> 00:42:47,360
look for people to join you as a
team who are better than you at

765
00:42:47,360 --> 00:42:50,680
the things that you want to do,
because then it helps things

766
00:42:50,680 --> 00:42:54,600
grow in a much more efficient
way and in a much more fluid

767
00:42:54,600 --> 00:42:57,200
way.
Like, for example, I would be

768
00:42:57,200 --> 00:43:00,360
lying if I said I was good at
the admin sort of like side of

769
00:43:00,360 --> 00:43:02,680
things.
I'm, I was slow at responding to

770
00:43:02,680 --> 00:43:06,200
emails, for example.
I'm not really good at Excel.

771
00:43:06,200 --> 00:43:09,360
I, I hate Excel.
I can't use it.

772
00:43:11,520 --> 00:43:15,640
If I was the one doing all of
those things, then it, it just

773
00:43:15,640 --> 00:43:19,280
wouldn't end up being good for
the organization and all of

774
00:43:19,280 --> 00:43:21,320
these things.
Like if I, I think the slower

775
00:43:21,320 --> 00:43:26,320
you are to admit to your
shortcomings and the more it

776
00:43:26,320 --> 00:43:29,440
affects your business and the
more it negatively affects your

777
00:43:29,440 --> 00:43:33,080
business is what I really mean.
The pride that we can sometimes

778
00:43:33,240 --> 00:43:36,480
have as people who are leading
something, it can be to our own

779
00:43:36,480 --> 00:43:38,560
downfall.
I just think that when you're

780
00:43:38,560 --> 00:43:42,080
building something that is
beyond yourself and is something

781
00:43:42,080 --> 00:43:46,240
that should be benefiting people
and benefiting society at large,

782
00:43:46,400 --> 00:43:49,880
it is extremely important to be
humble in that regard.

783
00:43:49,880 --> 00:43:53,800
And it's so important to just be
able to say somebody else might

784
00:43:53,800 --> 00:43:56,720
be better fit for this.
And I'm going to let them

785
00:43:56,720 --> 00:44:00,760
because in fact, I can learn
from somebody who's doing better

786
00:44:00,760 --> 00:44:02,240
than me.
And then perhaps, you know,

787
00:44:02,240 --> 00:44:04,160
maybe I would be able to improve
my skills.

788
00:44:04,440 --> 00:44:06,920
And this were another.
So it's really taught me the

789
00:44:06,920 --> 00:44:11,080
importance of teamwork and in
relinquishing that sense of

790
00:44:11,080 --> 00:44:15,920
control because, yeah, control,
it sometimes can feel like

791
00:44:15,920 --> 00:44:17,240
something that's.
So it's great.

792
00:44:17,240 --> 00:44:19,960
Like, yeah, I know everything
that's going on, but it can

793
00:44:19,960 --> 00:44:22,640
catch up to you very quickly.
And I think if you want to build

794
00:44:22,640 --> 00:44:26,400
anything of scale, you need to
learn how to let go of it.

795
00:44:27,360 --> 00:44:30,560
I think it really is such a
testament to self growth, isn't

796
00:44:30,600 --> 00:44:35,640
it, to realize for yourself, and
I so admit to yourself, what you

797
00:44:35,640 --> 00:44:38,240
should be doing and what you
should be focusing on rather

798
00:44:38,240 --> 00:44:41,520
than just kind of almost blindly
doing everything just because

799
00:44:41,520 --> 00:44:44,320
you can.
I think that's a very strategic

800
00:44:44,320 --> 00:44:46,200
move in terms of the mindset
shift.

801
00:44:46,440 --> 00:44:49,880
And I think generally that's a
sign of someone really, really

802
00:44:49,880 --> 00:44:52,160
kind of growing and certainly
into adulthood.

803
00:44:52,360 --> 00:44:55,400
So I love that you were able to
share that with me ago.

804
00:44:55,400 --> 00:44:57,920
I also did want to ask you
because you've referred to your

805
00:44:57,920 --> 00:45:01,320
faith quite a few Times Now, and
I actually read A blog where you

806
00:45:01,320 --> 00:45:03,760
wrote a few years ago about
losing your dad and how you

807
00:45:03,760 --> 00:45:07,080
actually struggled Recon signing
with your faith in the period

808
00:45:07,080 --> 00:45:09,320
afterwards.
Would you be able to share a bit

809
00:45:09,320 --> 00:45:12,520
more about how you're still able
to stay true and believe in your

810
00:45:12,520 --> 00:45:16,280
faith even after losing someone
so dear and also so close to

811
00:45:16,280 --> 00:45:20,320
you?
Yes, wow, beautiful question and

812
00:45:20,320 --> 00:45:23,880
I guess to give people context
who didn't read that blog post

813
00:45:23,880 --> 00:45:27,640
of mine, after losing my dad, I
went through a pretty rocky

814
00:45:27,640 --> 00:45:32,000
journey on my face.
I had a lot of questions to to

815
00:45:32,000 --> 00:45:35,000
God and I didn't really
understand why things had to

816
00:45:35,000 --> 00:45:38,480
happen in the way that they did.
I was somebody that really

817
00:45:38,480 --> 00:45:42,280
believed that, you know, God was
going to heal him and that he

818
00:45:42,280 --> 00:45:44,520
would be fine because I knew he
was sick.

819
00:45:44,520 --> 00:45:48,720
But I just believed that he
would end up being OK because

820
00:45:49,040 --> 00:45:51,880
essentially my dad had a
condition that when he was first

821
00:45:51,880 --> 00:45:56,080
diagnosed from it or with that
condition, I searched the

822
00:45:56,080 --> 00:45:59,760
expected life expectancy and it
was somewhere between 3:00 to

823
00:45:59,760 --> 00:46:01,280
five years.
That's what they said.

824
00:46:01,720 --> 00:46:04,360
So what's the five year mark had
passed?

825
00:46:04,840 --> 00:46:08,280
I was convinced that he was
going to just jump into the

826
00:46:08,280 --> 00:46:11,920
other bracket because certain
websites pretty much said on

827
00:46:11,960 --> 00:46:15,360
average it's three to five
years, but some people can live

828
00:46:15,600 --> 00:46:19,840
an extra 15 to 20 years.
And so because he had missed

829
00:46:19,840 --> 00:46:22,280
that five year, he had jumped
past the five year mark.

830
00:46:22,280 --> 00:46:25,440
I was like, great, that means
he's in the 15 to 20 year

831
00:46:25,440 --> 00:46:28,080
bracket.
And that's maybe that's on me

832
00:46:28,080 --> 00:46:31,120
for not understanding like how
averages and stuff work.

833
00:46:31,680 --> 00:46:34,040
But I had hope.
That was essentially what made

834
00:46:34,040 --> 00:46:37,240
me believe that I had a lot of
hope that he was going to end up

835
00:46:37,240 --> 00:46:40,800
being OK.
When things started going

836
00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:44,960
downwards, it really took me
aback because I've always known

837
00:46:44,960 --> 00:46:48,240
my dad to be a resilient person.
When I was growing up, I had

838
00:46:48,240 --> 00:46:51,600
never seen him sick as and I had
not so much as seen him have a

839
00:46:51,600 --> 00:46:54,840
cold.
So suddenly seeing him be

840
00:46:54,840 --> 00:46:58,720
diagnosed with a condition that
is like pretty much terminal

841
00:46:58,720 --> 00:47:03,600
he's, it's not going to improve.
It was extremely hard for me to

842
00:47:03,600 --> 00:47:06,720
reckon with.
And so I had no choice really

843
00:47:06,960 --> 00:47:11,760
but to turn to my faith in Jesus
and to say, OK, I can't do

844
00:47:11,760 --> 00:47:14,640
anything about this situation.
And I was really young at the

845
00:47:14,640 --> 00:47:16,680
time as well.
I was like 15 when he was

846
00:47:16,680 --> 00:47:19,680
diagnosed.
So I was really like, OK, God,

847
00:47:19,680 --> 00:47:22,800
you're gonna have to do
something here because I, I

848
00:47:22,800 --> 00:47:25,000
clearly can't do anything
myself.

849
00:47:25,560 --> 00:47:29,320
And so that's why when he ended
up passing, it was hard for me.

850
00:47:29,320 --> 00:47:32,120
And I'll share something
personal that I haven't actually

851
00:47:32,160 --> 00:47:36,080
shared online before ever.
But basically the week before my

852
00:47:36,080 --> 00:47:40,360
dad passed away, I had a dream.
And in that dream, it was like

853
00:47:40,560 --> 00:47:44,120
such a, such a bizarre dream for
me because it, I've never had

854
00:47:44,120 --> 00:47:46,120
any dream like that before in my
life.

855
00:47:46,480 --> 00:47:49,320
Everything was pretty much white
in the dream.

856
00:47:50,200 --> 00:47:54,720
My dad had come back from
Nigeria to Ireland because he

857
00:47:54,720 --> 00:47:56,680
was in Nigeria at the time when
he died.

858
00:47:57,000 --> 00:47:59,520
He had come back from Nigeria to
Ireland in the dream.

859
00:47:59,520 --> 00:48:04,440
And he pretty much walks up to
me and it was me, my mum and my

860
00:48:04,440 --> 00:48:07,760
sister there.
And he sits beside this wall.

861
00:48:08,400 --> 00:48:11,840
And as he's sitting beside this
wall, nobody says anything in

862
00:48:11,840 --> 00:48:13,840
the dream.
It's just this, it's just a

863
00:48:13,840 --> 00:48:15,480
strange sense of, I don't even
know.

864
00:48:15,800 --> 00:48:18,440
But he sits beside this wall and
we sit down beside him.

865
00:48:18,520 --> 00:48:22,920
And as we're sitting there, I
start seeing thank yous coming

866
00:48:22,960 --> 00:48:26,080
out of my dad, as in, like
written thank yous.

867
00:48:26,080 --> 00:48:30,000
It's like thank you and for this
role in my life that you played,

868
00:48:30,240 --> 00:48:32,400
Thank you to this person for
doing this.

869
00:48:32,400 --> 00:48:35,960
It's that she like 1,000,000
thank yous just started leaving

870
00:48:35,960 --> 00:48:38,000
him.
And I was reading all of them as

871
00:48:38,000 --> 00:48:42,280
they were kind of going out.
And I remember waking up that

872
00:48:42,280 --> 00:48:45,160
morning because I am somebody
that believes that.

873
00:48:45,160 --> 00:48:47,840
I know everybody has different
beliefs, but I am somebody that

874
00:48:47,840 --> 00:48:50,480
believes that sometimes God
speaks to us in dreams.

875
00:48:50,920 --> 00:48:55,600
And so I remember I had a strong
feeling that dream didn't come

876
00:48:55,600 --> 00:48:58,080
from myself.
There was just a strange aura

877
00:48:58,080 --> 00:49:01,160
around it that didn't seem like
something just kind of

878
00:49:01,360 --> 00:49:04,840
coincidental.
And I felt it so strongly that I

879
00:49:04,840 --> 00:49:08,000
was really kind of afraid as to
what the dream was trying to

880
00:49:08,000 --> 00:49:10,600
tell me.
The weirder thing was that I

881
00:49:10,600 --> 00:49:14,400
woke up with this strong sense
of peace after dreaming that,

882
00:49:14,920 --> 00:49:18,360
and I was actually very angry at
the peace that I felt because I

883
00:49:18,360 --> 00:49:21,440
didn't understand why I should
feel peace after a dream like

884
00:49:21,440 --> 00:49:23,640
that.
I remember kind of being like to

885
00:49:23,640 --> 00:49:26,200
God, I don't understand why you
would give me a dream like that

886
00:49:26,240 --> 00:49:29,680
and follow it by peace because
to me that almost seemed like

887
00:49:29,680 --> 00:49:33,200
confirmation that the dream was
coming from God because that

888
00:49:33,200 --> 00:49:34,760
sense of peace was coming from
it.

889
00:49:35,440 --> 00:49:39,440
And so I remember frantically
calling my dad the next day and

890
00:49:39,440 --> 00:49:41,680
he didn't pick up.
And I was panicking because I

891
00:49:41,680 --> 00:49:44,200
thought the dream was to tell me
he's died.

892
00:49:44,680 --> 00:49:47,880
Around the time my dad was
passing, I started getting this

893
00:49:47,880 --> 00:49:50,120
weird inkling that something
terrible would happen.

894
00:49:50,120 --> 00:49:53,440
So I used to check his WhatsApp
and I would be reassured when

895
00:49:53,440 --> 00:49:56,800
I'd see, oh, last online, you
know, a couple hours ago.

896
00:49:57,160 --> 00:49:59,760
And so even though he didn't
pick up, I saw that he was last

897
00:49:59,760 --> 00:50:01,120
online a while ago.
I was OK.

898
00:50:01,120 --> 00:50:04,320
So he's fine, He's still alive.
And then two days later, he

899
00:50:04,320 --> 00:50:07,560
calls me back and we have a
conversation.

900
00:50:07,560 --> 00:50:11,240
And that actually ended up being
our last conversation.

901
00:50:11,640 --> 00:50:16,880
And a couple days after, so a
week after I had that dream, he

902
00:50:16,880 --> 00:50:19,720
passed away.
And I remember even when I had

903
00:50:19,720 --> 00:50:22,040
that dreams, one of the things
that I wrote down, because

904
00:50:22,040 --> 00:50:24,600
sometimes I write down like
interesting dreams like that

905
00:50:24,600 --> 00:50:28,360
that I would have, I wrote down
felt like a goodbye.

906
00:50:28,680 --> 00:50:31,760
And I don't know why that that
happened to be the case.

907
00:50:31,760 --> 00:50:35,840
And so, yeah, on the 19th of
November, he passes.

908
00:50:35,840 --> 00:50:39,600
And I was in shock and in
disbelief.

909
00:50:39,600 --> 00:50:44,360
I was really, really obviously
heartbroken that what I felt was

910
00:50:44,360 --> 00:50:46,760
coming had now actually
happened.

911
00:50:47,280 --> 00:50:50,160
It's, it's interesting because,
yeah, my relationship with God

912
00:50:50,160 --> 00:50:52,400
really took a downturn after
that.

913
00:50:52,400 --> 00:50:55,160
I really struggled to trust in
him.

914
00:50:55,160 --> 00:50:59,280
I didn't understand why he would
let something like this happen,

915
00:50:59,280 --> 00:51:01,840
you know, because sometimes it's
like, if you have the power to

916
00:51:01,840 --> 00:51:03,720
do this, why wouldn't you change
it?

917
00:51:04,000 --> 00:51:07,040
Why wouldn't you turn the
situation into something better?

918
00:51:07,080 --> 00:51:11,800
But it's really funny because in
that time of feeling intense

919
00:51:11,800 --> 00:51:17,920
pain and anger and sorrow, after
a while, I decided to pretty

920
00:51:17,920 --> 00:51:22,360
much open up my Bible and I
started reading and, and what

921
00:51:22,360 --> 00:51:27,000
are the things that really stuck
out to me was the fact that God

922
00:51:27,000 --> 00:51:29,520
knows what it's like to lose a
loved one too.

923
00:51:29,520 --> 00:51:32,800
I mean, I, I'm a Christian and
so I believe that, you know,

924
00:51:32,840 --> 00:51:35,840
Jesus Christ died and, and was
resurrected and all of these

925
00:51:35,840 --> 00:51:37,760
things.
But I thought about the fact

926
00:51:37,760 --> 00:51:43,160
that Jesus Christ died and so
that means God knows what lost

927
00:51:43,160 --> 00:51:45,880
feels like.
Even historically, it's known

928
00:51:45,880 --> 00:51:49,560
that Joseph, like his his
physical earthly dad, wasn't

929
00:51:49,560 --> 00:51:53,640
around for his whole life,
meaning he passed for Jesus,

930
00:51:53,640 --> 00:51:56,800
went back.
That made me think, OK, Jesus

931
00:51:56,800 --> 00:52:00,600
understands lost too.
And that changed my perspective

932
00:52:00,600 --> 00:52:03,920
because I was like, I kind of
was seeing God in this negative

933
00:52:03,920 --> 00:52:06,360
light of how can you let me go
through this?

934
00:52:06,360 --> 00:52:09,040
And suddenly I thought, he's
gone through it too.

935
00:52:09,480 --> 00:52:12,880
And so he's not trying to punish
me by allowing me to go through

936
00:52:12,880 --> 00:52:15,520
something like this.
And that's when my mindset

937
00:52:15,520 --> 00:52:17,840
surrounding death really began
to change.

938
00:52:17,840 --> 00:52:21,840
I started seeing it as something
that is horrible and painful and

939
00:52:21,840 --> 00:52:26,640
people don't want to go through.
But there is a sense of beauty

940
00:52:26,640 --> 00:52:30,800
in the finality of life.
Like not not to become super

941
00:52:30,800 --> 00:52:33,480
philosophical or something, but
I really have thought about

942
00:52:33,480 --> 00:52:37,720
this.
The fact that, you know, if we

943
00:52:37,800 --> 00:52:41,280
were going to live forever, we
would live in a completely

944
00:52:41,280 --> 00:52:43,840
different way as to us living
now.

945
00:52:44,400 --> 00:52:48,680
The sense, the fact that we have
this quote UN quote deadline,

946
00:52:48,680 --> 00:52:52,560
this final time here on earth,
the fact that's creeping up on

947
00:52:52,560 --> 00:52:56,120
all of us, it informs the way we
choose to live our lives every

948
00:52:56,120 --> 00:52:58,720
single day.
It's what helps us to be more

949
00:52:58,720 --> 00:53:02,120
present in situation.
It's what helps us to show love

950
00:53:02,120 --> 00:53:05,040
to people that you know, on our
worst days, we might not want to

951
00:53:05,040 --> 00:53:09,160
show love to the knowledge, even
if it's subconscious of death

952
00:53:09,160 --> 00:53:11,720
being something that can affect
us or our loved ones.

953
00:53:12,000 --> 00:53:15,240
It actually helps us to be the
best sort of human beings that

954
00:53:15,240 --> 00:53:18,720
we can be.
And I didn't realize any of this

955
00:53:18,720 --> 00:53:22,400
until my dad had passed.
And that's when I kind of saw it

956
00:53:22,400 --> 00:53:24,840
as, OK, yes, I don't think death
was something that God

957
00:53:24,840 --> 00:53:29,000
originally wanted for human
beings, but I think he's turned

958
00:53:29,000 --> 00:53:32,240
it into something that can be a
beautiful thing.

959
00:53:32,560 --> 00:53:34,840
Although in the moment it never
feels that way.

960
00:53:34,840 --> 00:53:38,280
But in retrospect, you look back
and it's funny what I would, I

961
00:53:38,280 --> 00:53:42,760
love for my dad to be back
1000%, but would I be the person

962
00:53:42,760 --> 00:53:47,560
I am today if he was?
No, I, I absolutely wouldn't.

963
00:53:47,560 --> 00:53:53,160
It, it shaped me into who I am.
And I'm so grateful that my

964
00:53:53,160 --> 00:53:57,280
faith was able to help me get to
that, that point of this is

965
00:53:57,280 --> 00:53:59,960
actually all right.
And there's so many people who

966
00:53:59,960 --> 00:54:03,600
have experienced this.
And again, I think that just

967
00:54:03,600 --> 00:54:08,160
realizing that God does love us
and he is, he does want the best

968
00:54:08,160 --> 00:54:10,640
for us and he's not out to get
us.

969
00:54:11,000 --> 00:54:13,160
That helped me to reconcile with
my faith.

970
00:54:13,160 --> 00:54:16,480
And so slowly I started, you
know, attending church groups or

971
00:54:16,480 --> 00:54:19,160
like connecting with other
people who had a stronger faith

972
00:54:19,160 --> 00:54:22,400
to me at that time.
And they really helped me to

973
00:54:22,400 --> 00:54:25,400
uplift my spirit.
And yeah, thankfully things are

974
00:54:25,520 --> 00:54:28,160
pretty smooth sailing now.
It's always up and down, but I

975
00:54:28,160 --> 00:54:31,200
think that that's natural with
anything that means a lot to

976
00:54:31,200 --> 00:54:33,360
you.
No, for sure, I think grief

977
00:54:33,360 --> 00:54:35,600
comes in waves.
And thank you so much for

978
00:54:35,600 --> 00:54:37,680
sharing your own personal
revelation.

979
00:54:37,680 --> 00:54:40,240
Whilst you were talking, I was
actually thinking, gosh, it's so

980
00:54:40,240 --> 00:54:42,600
true.
I think the fact as humans we

981
00:54:42,600 --> 00:54:46,320
have a limited time on earth and
the fact that we know that we

982
00:54:46,320 --> 00:54:48,240
have that limited time is
probably, as you said, what

983
00:54:48,240 --> 00:54:51,840
makes us more present, but also
what makes us really appreciate

984
00:54:51,840 --> 00:54:55,320
and have this urge to make the
most of the out of the time that

985
00:54:55,320 --> 00:54:59,160
we do have on Earth.
I was also thinking a slight

986
00:54:59,160 --> 00:55:02,680
parallel would be when I speak
with new mothers, for example,

987
00:55:02,680 --> 00:55:06,760
and they always say after they
return to work, even though they

988
00:55:06,760 --> 00:55:09,560
theoretically have less time now
because they have to look after

989
00:55:09,560 --> 00:55:12,880
a child after work, it actually
makes them more productive and

990
00:55:12,880 --> 00:55:15,680
also more effective at work
because they know, OK, I have

991
00:55:15,680 --> 00:55:18,680
this block of time, but I'm at
work, I'm going to be whizzing

992
00:55:18,680 --> 00:55:21,680
through all these things so that
when the time comes, I can go

993
00:55:21,680 --> 00:55:24,160
home and just be fully present
and spend time with my child.

994
00:55:24,440 --> 00:55:27,400
So I think again, it's that
concept of knowing, as you were

995
00:55:27,400 --> 00:55:30,800
saying, knowing that we have
this block of time and then

996
00:55:30,800 --> 00:55:34,480
that's what triggers and
motivates individuals to, you

997
00:55:34,480 --> 00:55:38,080
know, do the best that they can
and try to find purpose and also

998
00:55:38,160 --> 00:55:40,360
act on that purpose that they
have found in their life.

999
00:55:40,600 --> 00:55:43,880
So absolutely loved that.
And then please never apologize

1000
00:55:43,880 --> 00:55:46,720
for being too philosophical.
I feel like in this day and age,

1001
00:55:46,720 --> 00:55:49,640
we need more of that because
it's good reflection of some

1002
00:55:49,640 --> 00:55:52,760
from each individual and every
individual, such as yourself and

1003
00:55:52,760 --> 00:55:54,920
myself.
We've had a complete different

1004
00:55:54,920 --> 00:55:57,400
set of experiences growing up
that's so unique to us.

1005
00:55:57,880 --> 00:56:01,840
And yes, I was going to make us
have our own views and

1006
00:56:01,840 --> 00:56:04,400
reflections on the world.
And that's part of the really

1007
00:56:04,400 --> 00:56:06,200
beautiful tapestry.
Oh, go, go.

1008
00:56:06,200 --> 00:56:09,480
I don't want to end that.
I have taken up enough of your

1009
00:56:09,480 --> 00:56:11,760
time on this eve after your
exam.

1010
00:56:11,760 --> 00:56:16,040
But before I let you, let me ask
you one final question, which is

1011
00:56:16,320 --> 00:56:19,320
what do you think is one thing
that will allow more people to

1012
00:56:19,320 --> 00:56:23,320
have better mental health?
One thing that I think would

1013
00:56:23,320 --> 00:56:28,360
benefit people in terms of their
mental health is actually like

1014
00:56:28,360 --> 00:56:34,680
#1 OK, maybe I'll cheat and say,
2, Yep #1 leading on people

1015
00:56:34,680 --> 00:56:38,240
around you, as I said earlier,
not being afraid that you're a

1016
00:56:38,240 --> 00:56:40,520
burden to the people who are in
your life.

1017
00:56:40,520 --> 00:56:42,240
They're in your life for a
reason.

1018
00:56:42,280 --> 00:56:45,520
And so we should always feel
like we can rely on those who

1019
00:56:45,520 --> 00:56:48,040
love us.
But also movement.

1020
00:56:48,160 --> 00:56:53,160
I really believe in physical
movement and an exercise and it

1021
00:56:53,160 --> 00:56:55,720
doesn't have to be high
intensity, it doesn't have to be

1022
00:56:55,720 --> 00:56:58,600
high rocks.
You can go on a walk and these

1023
00:56:58,600 --> 00:57:01,040
these things have a positive
effect on our site.

1024
00:57:01,080 --> 00:57:04,600
I think sometimes when things
sound too simplistic, we're very

1025
00:57:04,600 --> 00:57:08,040
quick to dismiss them.
But I can say for a fact that

1026
00:57:08,520 --> 00:57:12,320
incorporating physical movement
into my daily routine has

1027
00:57:12,400 --> 00:57:16,440
transformed my mental health.
And it's not even just about,

1028
00:57:16,440 --> 00:57:19,440
oh, saying I exercise for the
sake of, of being able to say

1029
00:57:19,440 --> 00:57:23,200
that, but the chemicals that the
body releases as a result of

1030
00:57:23,200 --> 00:57:26,520
doing those things really is
beneficial for our mental

1031
00:57:26,520 --> 00:57:28,000
health.
So I would definitely say

1032
00:57:28,000 --> 00:57:31,960
leaning on people and physically
moving as often as possible.

1033
00:57:32,000 --> 00:57:34,680
Absolutely agree, I laughed
earlier because you mentioned

1034
00:57:34,680 --> 00:57:37,400
Hyrox and and I was just
thinking back to the one time

1035
00:57:37,400 --> 00:57:40,400
that I did do it, it was
actually OK, but I much prefer

1036
00:57:40,480 --> 00:57:45,080
going for work.
Yeah, I think I haven't given up

1037
00:57:45,160 --> 00:57:46,560
by high rocks yet.
One day.

1038
00:57:47,000 --> 00:57:48,920
One day for sure.
Well ago.

1039
00:57:48,920 --> 00:57:51,440
It was such a pleasure to have
you on the Low to Grow podcast.

1040
00:57:51,440 --> 00:57:54,680
Thank you for sharing your time.
Thank you so much for having me,

1041
00:57:54,680 --> 00:57:57,600
it's been a pleasure.
Thank you for listening you

1042
00:57:57,600 --> 00:58:01,440
excited for the next episode?
Follow Low to Grow podcast on

1043
00:58:01,440 --> 00:58:04,640
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1044
00:58:04,640 --> 00:58:05,280
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